The Increasing Sophistication Surrounding Scams

Recently I wrote a post describing card skimmers, as one of the many technological scams. But everyday we read about another poor person who was scammed in some other way. Everything from corporate fraud, to bitcoin scams, to websites that look legitimate but are designed to defraud unsuspecting customers, to romance scams, and everything in between.

We can learn from the mistakes other people make. Every year hundreds of millions of dollars are lost to romance scams. Many people scoff at how naive some people can be. But we have to keep in mind the victims are first targeted, and then carefully groomed by a network of organized criminals.

Most victims have gone through recent divorce, or the death of a spouse. They are susceptible to flattery, wishful thinking, escapism, and hope for some relief of loneliness, tedium, and loss.

Once a person takes the bait, they are literally on the hook. They become so emotionally invested, they cannot untangle themselves. In addition, once they become involved, somewhat like a drug mule, they are committed. Often the victims are blind participants in money laundering, and bank fraud. On an intuitive level, they may know this to be the case, but their denial will not allow them to process it.

Romance scams cost hundreds of millions of dollars nationwide every year, and are on the rise. Like many other scams, they tend to be under reported because the victims feel so ashamed. In some cases, even when faced with irrefutable evidence, the victim still wants to be in love with the illusion, and cannot let it go.

It struck me as odd to see an 84 year old woman madly in love with a 62 year old fake profile. The man they were representing had no idea his image had been stolen to be used in such a manner. He was a fit, blond haired, blue-eyed person of European or American descent. Yet the man who was on the phone with this woman had a thick Nigerian accent. Even so, she continued to associate her online lover with the fake photograph.

The scammers love bomb their victim. Anyone who tells an 84 year old woman she is drop dead gorgeous has to be a scammer. Only a husband of sixty years would think so. But regardless, this woman was smitten. She believed what she wanted to believe.

Romance scams have many common denominators. They target their victims carefully, they get them on the hook, love bomb, can never meet in person due to various circumstances, and then they start hitting them up for money. They do this once they believe the person actually thinks they have a future together, so they are willing to invest more and more into the fake relationship.

In reality, it is not much different than believing in Santa Claus or the tooth fairy. Rule number one for all online dating, is never send the person money. If you have not met them, you do not know who they are.

Investment scams are another huge loss for many people. One woman who thought she was transferring funds buying government bonds, was tricked into depositing $750,000 online. She mistakenly believed she was making the transfer through a legitimate online investment company. But as it turned out, the company was fake, and within a matter of days after she made the deposit, the website, and the slick fraudster disappeared entirely.

In another recent situation, a man in his late seventies sold his house for $800,000, thinking he would downsize, and have enough money for his golden years. Shortly after he sold his house, he got a text message telling him he had won $17 million in a lottery. But there was a catch. He had to pay the taxes on the money before they would release the funds. I guess he must have been a person who bought lottery tickets. 

He immediately began transferring all the money from the sale of his house to the fraudulent account, until it was gone. Understandably, he is now broke, ashamed, and devastated. His daughter had no clue this was happening, until it was too late. 

Scams can affect us in many different ways. Once we become over emotional, or compelled to react, we are not thinking clearly, and might take foolish, and impulsive risks.

Scammers are looking first for a connection with you, and then a response. You can eliminate many of the phone scammers by going into the Settings on your phone, and silencing all unknown callers.

Another younger woman was scammed out of more than $50,000 based on a spoof call from her bank. She ended up divulging personal information, and the scammer was able to drain her account. Within a matter of minutes, she realized it was a scam, and contacted her bank asking them to freeze her account immediately, but it was too late. The reason she recognized it was a scam was because after getting her account information, which was with a major bank, they then said her bitcoin account was also compromised. She thought, wait a minute – what does this bank have to do with a totally separate bitcoin account?

The saddest thing about most of the scams, is that the money is not retrievable. In some cases, the victim actually gave their money away. But in other cases, they are duped in a very devious manner. How many people are adept at discerning fake logos?

Those fake logos are now coming from every mainstream organization – from PayPal, to Amazon, UPS, Canada Post, email addresses, major banks, CRA, and so on.

Like most other scams, the scammer pushes for an immediate response or a reaction. They want you to click on a link, follow certain login information, call a phone number, or respond to an email. They create a sense of urgency.

Keep in mind, if they contacted you, they are the ones who want something, not you. You can always delete their message, and login to your bank account, PayPal, CRA or Amazon account etc. to check on the recent activity. Chances are, you will immediately see that the claims sent by the scammer are bogus. Your account is in good standing with no unusual activity.

Some of the scammers will threaten you. I had one very stern voice mail caller claiming to be from immigration. They were threatening to deport me if I did not respond to them immediately. I was born in Canada, and have never had anything to do with immigration, so I knew it was a scam. But I can see that it might have been unsettling if I was an immigrant.

It seems like there is an exponential growth in scams. Just when you think you have seen it all, new ones pop up. No one is immune. People across the entire spectrum of wealth and intelligence have been scammed, from the low end to the high end.

To help protect ourselves, it is a good rule of thumb to avoid responding to any, and all unsolicited emails, text messages and phone calls. This includes surveys over recent purchases or deliveries. Many of those contacts are innocuous parts of a company marketing campaign. But we are under no obligation to respond. If you make a purchase and like it, you will keep it. If not, you will return it. You don’t need to answer surveys on whether or not you liked your shopping experience.

Some of those surveys are ridiculously long. Like who wants to answer a ten page survey over a popcorn maker?

Go ahead, be cynical, skeptical, and a conspiracy theorist. Because when it comes to scams – it is a conspiracy. The fake romancer is often part of a criminal network. Same with the fake investment website, or bitcoin bait.

They know it is human nature to be fooled by flattery. They also know people are lured by the promise of quick gain. So if a bond usually pays 1% interest, they can lure naive individuals by saying they will pay 5% interest.

One of the worst cases of fraud I have ever read about involved a couple who were selling a boat. They were fit, world travellers, in their fifties, and the husband had been with law enforcement. So they did not appear to be easy targets.

But they were taken in by a young couple with a baby who said they wanted to buy the boat. The victims had recently had a grandchild, and were selling their boat to move back to land to be close to their grandchild. In addition, they were taken in by a fraudulent lure to make the sale tax exempt. The perps brought along their own notary, who was also in on the scam.

The unsuspecting couple took these people on a cruise to show them the boat. At the last minute, the perps brought along another thug, who they claimed was their accountant.

Once they were out on the water, they soon realized they were in deep trouble. They were overpowered, and then chained to the anchor, and thrown overboard. The reenactment of their final couple of hours is so harrowing, I don’t know how their families could cope.

We all would like to be able to give people the benefit of the doubt. So often people see many red flags, but ignore them or rationalize them away. The couple with the boat did see several red flags. They did have a “bad feeling” because they voiced it before the tragedy. But for whatever reasons, they went ahead with it, just wanting to get the boat sold, so they could move on with their new plans.

Our intuition, or gut feelings are actually our second brain. They are sending us signals that often cannot be put into words. Our gut feeling is our warning light, or danger signal telling us to stop the transaction, or meeting, or whatever. 

Probably the best advice, is to always pay attention to what our gut is telling us. It can save us not only from scams targeting our bank accounts, but more importantly, it can save our life if we fall into a dangerous snare. 

If you get trapped into a longterm scam relationship, getting out is a matter of survival. Remember, if you are in a situation you cannot leave – it means you are far worse off if you stay. In some cases, you have to give up everything, just to get out from under it. 

One of the biggest mistakes people make, is to think the perp will not harm them. The perpetrator does not care about the victim in the least. The victim means nothing to them, other than what the victim can do for them, or how they can exploit the victim for personal gain. 

First and foremost, you cannot trust a liar. If someone is constantly lying to you – they will take, and keep on taking, until you firmly put a stop to it. They will scheme behind your back. They will manipulate, coerce, bully, brainwash, gaslight, and use every trick in the book to bilk you, or turn you into their personal slave. 

If they are pretending to be someone they are not – they see you as an easy mark. If they can craft a pseudo relationship to ensnare you, that means they are dominating, and in control. It is a form of bondage. The predator does not have the same mindset, or values as the average person.

Don’t make the mistake of believing they are decent human beings, when everything they represent is based on a lie. There is a reason they are called leeches. They will suck the lifeblood right out of you.

You can turn the other cheek, give them your cloak, and they will take over your house. Whatever you give them, they want more. They have no boundaries. 

We can forgive them, but first we have to get free of them, and only then, do we get clarity on what exactly happened. It can take a long time to heal and overcome the trauma inflicted on us by an invasive scammer. They will target your mind, your emotions, and your spirit, in a soul destroying game of cat and mouse.

We do not have to allow others to dominate and victimize us. We are actually supposed to be discerning. We should not allow anyone to bully us out of our better judgment, when it comes to our own life and security. 

Setting boundaries is an important aspect of protecting ourselves against scammers, and manipulative con artists. Lock them out of your life. 

Copyright Valerie J. Hayes and Quiet West (2025). Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author/owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Valerie J. Hayes and Quiet West with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.